Stolid. Stupid. Whatever. | Poor Blitzen

This word has changed. It used to mean stupid. Now it means slow to excite, a.k.a. stupid.

The stolid democrat insisted that if I like[d] my plan, I could keep my plan despite the fact that I had already lost it.

–A. Leland

The stolid, stupid old hound dog finally found a job on Hee Haw.


Stolid fielders make poor third basemen.

–Mr. Big Food

Much to his disadvantage, Blitzen remained stolid during the chaos of our arrival home.

–Daughter C

Indeed. Blitzen got his legs knocked out from under him. (We blame Missy.) A. Leland set him upright. And in trying to situate him properly, I knocked him over again. And this time, he was down for the count. 

Vixen was spared from Missy’s highjinx
Blitzen, on the other hand, is in the intensive care unit. He will require some reconstructive surgery.

Blitzen isn’t “covered.” Here at the Farm we tend to catastrophic injuries as they arise. Lose an antler? No prob. We won’t deduct it. We’ll just go get another. Need a leg-screw adjustment? Dr. Morton is happy to do that.



“Yes. Missy.”

“I’m sorry.” 

“Well, you should be, Missy. You ran into Blitzen. That wasn’t very polite.”

“I know. And I am sorry. I just thought that he might want to get into the fun of the game with the Rockster and I. We were having such fun.”


“Missy. That’s beneath you. You know Blitzen isn’t an animate deer.”


“I am a bit disappointed in you, Missy”

“I know. I am sorry.”

“Well. We love you. A. Leland will bring Blitzen back to life. Go to bed now and sleep sweet dreams. No real harm done.”