Geeze. I’m tired just reading this. And it’s only 2012.

How to Cook For / Feed 150 People: Part Three, Smokin’

Published on September 6, 2012 by Marica 

Updated throughout the day with newest on top.

The take away message is that Mr. Big Food is very organized! 
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FINAL UPDATE.  Done. 

Did I mention that we have company coming?

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9:06 PM UPDATE. (Working on over 15 hours of this.)

In about an hour,  I’m to put the 9-pound pig shoulder, a.k.a. “Boston Butt,” into the fridge.

And that’s it for today.

So, 36″ * 2.54cm/in = roughly 72 + 18 = 90cm * pi = 270+ centimeters cubed or 
270+ ml. Beans are dense b/c 10 pounds of beans weigh way more than 270+ grams.
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MATH UPDATE. We are trying to find the volume of a cylinder. (Nothing to do until 8:52.) I don’t remember but I bet I can look it up. And I bet if the lights go out, I could still look it up in some crappy old geometry book.

V =3.14159 26535 89793 23846 26433 83279 50288 41971 69399 37510 58209 74944 59230 78164 06286 20899 86280 34825 34211 70679 …[*] * r-squared * h

*Also known as π

where “*” (unless used as in a footnote sense) denotes the function, “times” as in multiply. 

So we have

pi = 3.14; 

h = 2/3 of 9″ = 6″;

and r = 1/2 diameter = ~6″.

Our answer will be in cubic inches. (π is unit-less, right? That’s irrational!) 

Wow. This is deep.

Moreover, π is a transcendental number – a number that is not the root of any nonzero polynomial having rational coefficients.

3.14 times 6-squared equals 113.4 cubic inches of small red beans.

Here’s where it gets tough. Cubic inches is not a common unit of measure.

8:52. Gotta go.
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Post-supper update. We pulled the last brisket off the smoker about 30 minutes ago.  There’re  still things to do. The last of the hunks of meat to come off the smoker-grills are cooling in the Bunkhouse where I turned the A/C way down today. (We’re so green.) They need to be transferred to a refrigerator as soon as they are sufficiently cool.

Mr. Big Food tells me that at 8pm we’ll get the small red beans soaking. I exaggerated earlier. It’s not 20 pounds of beans– only 10. Silly me.  

It’s been a challenging day, made all the more so by yesterday’s unfortunate incident. I was inadvertently leg slammed in the pasture by either a 48 pound dynamo or an 85 pound lumbering happy go-lucky doggie running at full speed– or both. I fell. Suffice it to say I was not running at full speed today. (See the lunchtime update for thinking ahead if I’m still not up to speed Saturday.)

Fifteen more minutes and then we do 8pm stuff. Then stuff at 8:52 & maybe later. 

Did I mention that Mr. Big Food is getting paid for this?? Hahahahaha. ROFLMAO.

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3:45. The first brisket has come out of the oven. This one will go in next.

Fifteen minutes until we get the last pork shoulder off the grill, and the third turkey breast. 

Mr. Big Food announced a little while ago that he will not be making supper tonight. I’ll run to The Grill in town and pick us up a catfish po’ boy and a burger. 

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2 o’clock update.  Whew. Mr. Big Food has everything timed to a tee. Another pig shoulder and turkey breast have just gone on the smoker-grills and I’ve lost track of what all else is going on. 

I will comment that there’s been a fair amount of cussin’ this last go-’round. And he’s no where near done.

Did I mention that there are 20 pounds of small red beans & a similar quantity of Basmati rice involved? Vegans have to eat, too!
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Lunchtime update. All three grills are smoking– one pork, one turkey, one brisket. And there’s a brisket with marinade in a turkey cooking bag in the oven.  

I’ve contact Daughter C– who in turn contacted Matt– and both have agreed to help in any way necessary. At issue is the fact that the game’s a morning game and so the tailgate will be after the game. And although the powers that be are working hard on this, there’s no sure way to know for certain if I’ll be able to drive the truck to the tailgate site to unload the food after the game has started. If not, Bruno, Joe and Joseph will help. But that still leaves the truck with no place to park. Enter Daughter C & Matt. It will be an exercise in generating order from chaos, à la Stewart Kaufman. 

Oh! Something’s about to happen. Later!
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 Note the bulge under the skin. It’s lemon, garlic, rosemary and bay leave. 

I keep saying grill, but Mr. Big Food is actually using these grills as smokers. Note the water pans sitting in the coals.

Earlier in the morning below.